Speaking to the crowd

My friend the librarian rang me yesterday with a proposal.

It was one she had mentioned to me last July when I had my exhibition at the library, and she had been so upbeat about my art, and about me as an artist then, so the full invite wasn't a surprise, it was just that I wasn't expecting it JUST yet! She asked me if I still wanted to do it? Yes, I said, I do. She said that if my nerves were going to get the better of me, it was best if I backed out now, before they have the publicity printed. No, I said, I will do it. I said I would last year, and stand by my promises. Ok, she said, as she gave me the date, and the time, and told me what was expected of me. I listened to her, she's always so inspirational in her positive attitude and supportive comments, and feeds my positivity. I could feel the excitement rise in me as we made the arrangements.

It helps somewhat that there will be more than just me there. But, I can see why she's asked me, and I can see my place within the setting. And I feel strongly that it is the right setting for me. There will be others there too, also doing their bit, although their "bits" are different to mine, but then perhaps that's what will make it more interesting for the audience.The audience isn't expected to be more than a hundred people, but it will be bigger than I've spoken to before, hence her asking me if I was still happy with the idea. 

The event is for Women in Arts, and she wants me to be part of it. I am proud to have been asked, and especially happy to accept since I am a female artist, mainly doing art based on women and the female form, so I can see my place there. I also know that part of what I do is good therapy for the people who have posed for me, and that I produce artwork that people really respond to, and which I hope is life enhancing. So, I am passionate about my profession as well as my art.

She wants me to talk for fifteen minutes with perhaps five minutes afterwards for questions. She assures me that as soon as I smile, I will win them over. She suggested I talk about any funny moments, any amusing tales, and just to talk about what I do..... as an Erotic Artist. Ok, an interesting subject already, and one that will intrigue most people before I start. Its my subject. I just need to get the subject matter in order, and dredge up the amusing tales.... there are enough of them, and certainly it helped when the librarian referred to me being the "cheeky one" during the event. I like that! It is, after all a cheeky subject. And although I am professional in my approach, I try to include humour and cheekiness within my demeanor, it helps to break any awkward moments I suppose for other people. I've got a few weeks to prepare, but I want to start as soon as I can to get my notes ready, and think what points I want to get across....... and whether I should mention the Fantasy Fannies or not. UUmmm........

Somethings got to give

Well somethings gotta give and unfortunately its got to be the art.
Short term, anyway.
I rang the librarian I've been dealing with at Burton Library to say that I was REALLY looking forward to this exhibition next week and was doing the best I could for getting ready for it. BUT, and it is a BIG but........ I am without a car at the moment until I get a courtesy car sorted out after my car accident last week. That's not a huge problem, just a minor annoyance and I can work around that.

But on top of that, I am sorting out my life and that is as ok as it can be, in the circumstances.

And just to add to the problems, I've found a house I really like, and have made an offer on it. Which has been accepted. So that means that what should have been quality time for sorting out the things I need for the exhibition have been taken up with endless phone calls and questions.

She kindly listened to all I said and helpfully suggested "Why don't you cancel it, and leave it until next year when you're more settled?"

"No" I replied, "I don't want to do that, although I may well exhibit there again next year when things have quietened down and I've got my life on track again. But I don't want to cancel, I want to do it, even though it won't be as good as I was hoping, it will be the best I can do, in the time I have".

Because, this is for the art.

All of it.

What on earth do you look like?

Does it matter what I look like? Is it important? Does it matter what sort of person I am and how I appeal to people?

I'm beginning to think it might.......................

Last week I had quite a bit of correspondence going back and forth between me and the library where I am hoping to exhibit next year. I'd met the woman I'm corresponding with at Stuarts Writers group, as she is part of it, and she also works for the library and thinks my erotic art would be fabulous at her library. Great!!! Very exciting, and a delight that she was so enthusiastic and positive about my art, and about me too. BUT, she and I both knew that I do erotic art, and some people struggle with it, and they might struggle a lot with it in a public library, if they are of a sensitive nature - or, of course, children. Some of my art is not at all suitable for children to view. I understand that. So, for that reason, I was asked to send some erotic images to my new friend at the library for her to check with her colleagues that it was "acceptable". No problem. I sent 30 of my more "acceptable" ones, 29 of which only had a single woman in the picture, so there was nothing sexual going on between two people in any of the pictures. The answer came back that whilst all the work was considered good and accomplished, some of it was deemed to be a little risque for the library, but if I would like to get together a collection of my other art, and put in some of the tamer erotic stuff, then that was fine by them, and I could ring up to book a date for next year. So, I rang to make the arrangement, and had another positive and upbeat conversation with my contact there. She made me smile when she said that some of the little old ladies might complain about some of my art and yet they took out "Mills and Boon" books by the dozens, and those books in particular are FULL of erotic goings on on EVERY page!!! I'm imagining all these fevered old ladies now getting all hot and bothered by the muscular thighs, square shoulders, tight buttocks, chiselled jaws but sensitive hands of Peregrine or whatever the hero's are called as they rip the clothes off the heroines in a frenzied and heated passionate embrace!

But, there was something else she said, that made me think. She said that she had shown my website to her female colleagues for them to see what sort of work I do. And whereas the art was considered acceptable as most of these women in their 50's and 60's had "seen it all before" there was one burning question they were intrigued about...............

They wanted to know........................... what I looked like. Was I young or old? Was I a punk with spiky hair? What was I like as a person? It REALLY mattered to them.

And that's got me thinking. Because last week I went to the annual art festival at Patchings and had a lovely day there looking around the arts and crafts being sold there, buying a few art materials, and chatting with the artist friends I bumped into whilst I was there. But there was one artist whose work bowled me over, it was stupendous. It was stunning (I'm not chosing these words lightly, I truly was *stunned* by them to the point of losing my words to start with, then after having a long and very positive chat with the artist in question, I had a strong feeling of the other art there being of a far lesser quality, and therefore not so important for me to spend my time looking at it afterwards!). But when I told other people about her, I said "The artwork was stupendous, the technical ability was fabulous, the way it was painted really spoke to me, the choice of composition called me, and the artist was a really nice person, she was lovely to talk to, and look at, and I really liked her!"

So. Have I answered my own question. Should I put more about myself on my website? Should I put a photo of myself on it? Would it make a difference to the people who like my art? Could they relate to me better because of it?

I've always presumed that I don't need to put more personal details on my site, because "the art talks for itself". But does it say enough?

And as a post-script: One of the reasons I haven't put my photo on my website is because I do erotic art. And I'm a woman. So, if I put my photo on my website, am I going to get aggravation from it?

What do you think? And I know some of you know me in real life, and some of you don't have a clue what I look like.

Does it matter?