Twiddling our thumbs and other bits

We dragged ourselves from our sick beds out into the cold winters night, drove through the dark on fog bound roads, around road blocks and detours, to arrive, a little frosted, at our destination. A warm and welcome greeting for all who had braved the winter chills to turn up at the meeting as we compared winter ailments, coughs and colds. The first one of the year for this artists group, and it turned out to be all women for once. It was good to see my arty friends again, and I knew the meeting wasn't going to be an overly long one as there wasn't a lot on the agenda. We settled ourselves in the meeting room, as we waited for our punctilious Chairman to arrive. He's usually the first there, with his cheery smile and easy manner. The waiting lengthened, as we wondered where he was, perhaps delayed with the road blocks on country lanes, or perhaps with the fog on high ground, either way, he'd be here soon.

He wasn't.

So, the ever efficient secretary decided that it might be prudent to start the meeting without him, and he could take over when he arrived. Which was bound to be shortly.We went down the points on the agenda, as fully as we were able, but after the great length of time of........ooooh............ twenty minutes, we'd done it all! Mmm.... so where's the Chairman then? Is he stuck in a ditch? Has there been an accident? Is he lost in the fog? Perhaps someone has been rushed to hospital? A quiet unease spread slowly through the room ...........

Then, someone said that it might be a good idea to ring his mobile, great idea, but no one had the number.  I suggested we rang his home phone, as I had that to hand, and perhaps his wife would know where he was and what was happening. The secretary used her mobile to ring, as the rest of us watched with slightly concerned eyes, mouths closed tight, in deathly silence.
Ring. Ring. Hello?

He answered!

Slight relief from the room as we realised he was ok, but what was wrong, why was he still at home? It turned out that he was still at home becuase as far as HE was concerned, the meeting was on Thursday! AH! ER.. no, it isn't! :) Amusement from the assembled group as relief set in that he was ok and had only got the wrong date for the meeting. What business that could be was conducted over the phone, whilst our illustrious Chairman got an ear bashing from his wife in the room with him, and also the piss taken out of him from the secretary on the phone at the same time for getting the date wrong! :)

So, that was the meeting, not a lot to discuss, but as we left the meeting room, we had to walk through a bar room, semi-full of men with warm pints of the local bitter in their hands. They're a jolly group, mostly ex-miners, and I knew a couple of them, and stopped as they obviously wanted to chat - the first to comment on the fact that he'd been tempted to come in and pose as he knew I draw naked men and "their twiddly bits"!!! Guffaws of laughter from me regarding his description!! And the second commented that I ought to draw a retired miner mate of his since he had more that I might be interested in - I realised he was referring to them all being in the showers after a shift down t'pit and obviously comparing sizes (of  twiddles) whilst rinsing the black coal dust off themselves. All very jolly, and amusing, mostly because I hadn't been drawing in the meeting room at all , but having a meeting in the meeting room, now with added visions of naked ex-miners rampaging into the room in the mistaken belief that we women in there wanted to draw them and their "twiddly bits"!!!!! Now, THAT would have lightened the proceedings more !!!!!! LOL (even more so that I'm the only one there who draws naked people, the rest draw landscapes, cats, flowers, and still life!!!!!!!!). Tee Hee