Love it or hate it

I had a very pleasant visit to the area of Eton and Windsor over the weekend, staying with two good friends of mine, and on Sunday morning made a visit to the main interest. That castle, the one that overlooks the surrounding countryside so solidly and stands so majestically and beautifully. It's been a great number of years since I was last at Windsor, or its castle, and thoroughly enjoyed being a tourist for a couple of hours, in the spring sunshine, and wandering around the town. Shops have come and gone, as they do in ensuing years, and my man and I wandered around with no particular plan, down one road here, along a side street, turn left or right as the fancy took us. And then as we passed an expensive looking gallery, he asked me if I wanted to go in? Yes, I'd like that. We walked in, as visitors, nothing to show to anyone that we were any different to any other visitor. We both looked at the art, not together particularly, just looking at the paintings in our own time. The girl who worked there did what gallery staff should do, and made full eye contact, smiled, and asked if there was anything in particular that we liked. I smiled at her, and nodded at a painting infront of me, and said evenly "What happened to her arm?" and she followed my gaze and said equally evenly "That's how the artist wanted to depict it". I frowned slightly and asked "Why?" then went on to say what a fabulously painted picture it was, I am an artist and can see how much work has gone into it, I admired the image of the girl sitting in the chair, the setting, the representational painting that was virtually a photograph, but the wrist of the girl was all wrong, infact I had presumed the model was deformed to start with, with an amputation, since the wrist literally looked like it had been cut off just above the hand. Bearing in mind the rest of the picture was astonishingly correct in its depiction, even down to the patterning in the carpet, why indeed had the artist been so negligent in painting her hand and wrist? I know if I were to buy the painting even at the high price that it was, that it would annoy me for ever more, since I'd always be looking at the fault within the painting.

The gallery girl and I chatted, she was friendly, and nice, and easy to talk to. They had some Rolf Harris paintings there too, and I admired two of them, particularly one of a Venetian canal, full of light and colour, veridian and lime green and reds all full of contrast and life. And then I looked at the two tiger paintings that were also his, and couldn't understand that they were even the same artist. They looked heavy and wooden in comparison. What had gone wrong there? I'm not overly critical of artwork, I know if I like it or not, and can tell if its captured the ambiance or not of the subject, whether a famous artist has painted it or an amateur. But, I do have to wonder, at a big gallery like that one (one of a well known chain) showing work like that. For those prices I'd want something closer to perfection, no matter who has painted it. And certainly if I was a buyer I would too!!!!!

I was pleased though, that as we talked, the gallery girl listened to what I was talking about, about speculative art, and framing, and making your life as an artist, and made the comment "You seem to understand as much about the financial side of art as the art" and I agreed that I needed to. That it is as important as the painting of pictures for me. I am in the business of selling my paintings, so I have to be. And I know that you can't say what is THE best painting, because anyone would argue with you, as they would prefer their own favourite against yours, because they had seen and picked up on something that you hadn't. And that is because brains are wired up differently and react in diverse ways to various stimuli.

So perhaps, its a wonder that any artwork makes the connection then, between artist and buyer. I know I am always absolutely delighted when someone says "I love it!" about a painting of mine that they have bought. And know then, that I have got it right. That connection.  And that's what its all about!!!

Joking apart

I was recently reminded of an erotic art joke and thought I'd share it with you..........


An artist had been working on a nude portrait for a long time. Every day, he was up early and worked late - bringing perfection with every stroke of his paint brush. As each day passed, he gained a better understanding of the female body and was able to really make his paintings shine.


After a month, the artist had become very weary from this non-stop effort and decided to take it easy for the day. Since his model had already shown up, he suggested they merely have a glass of wine and talk - since normally he preferred to do his painting in silence.

They talked for a few hours, getting to know each other better. Then as they were sipping their claret, the artist heard a car arriving outside. He jumped up and said, "Oh no! It's my wife! Quick, take off your clothes!"


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And whilst I'm in the mood for joke telling........


How many artists does it take to change a light bulb?

Ten. One to change it, and nine to reassure him about how good it looks.

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How many modern artists does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to throw bulbs against the wall, one to pile hundreds of them in a heap and spray-paint it orange, one to glue light bulbs to a cocker spaniel, and one to put a bulb in the socket and fill the room with light while all the critics and buyers are watching the fellow smashing the bulbs against the wall, the fellow with the spray-gun, and the cocker spaniel.

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How many visitors to an art gallery does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to do it and one to say "Huh! My four-year old could've done that!"
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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?



Fish.



 :)

Are ALL galleries like this?

I've been searching around again recently for decent galleries to enable me to show my art to a wider audience. But they seem to be sadly lacking............ somehow. I've been in two privately owned ones recently, in different but affluent parts of the country (Somerset and Cheshire) where there was a definite pattern to the way the visit went...............

I walked into the large and expensive looking gallery with a companion. Two people, who had made the effort of walking through the door. In both cases the person in the gallery was male, and on his own and not at all busy. Very little eye contact was made by the gallery man, even though I made a point on both occasions of trying to make it. We walked around, looking at the pictures, made comments about some and passed over others very quickly. We had opinions, and made them in an informed way. We were in the gallery for more than ten minutes. And at no point did the gallery man come out from behind his desk, at no point did he walk around with us asking what we were interested in, at no point did he try to start any conversation of any kind with us, at no point did he try to sell anything to us. As we left, and thanked him, he quietly acknowledged us. I walked out, feeling that I hadn't been given any "service" from him.

Am I missing something here?

Isn't the gallery there to "sell"? Or at least promote, or to interest people in some way in art?

Why didn't they make any effort? Are all the people who go into a gallery considered "time wasters"? Was it because I didn't look like a *buyer*? Do they work on the thought that if anyone wants to buy a painting, they'll ask?

Was I impressed with each gallery? No. Will I be trying to get my artwork into their gallery? No. Has this increased my faith in galleries? No. Will I still carry on looking at other galleries? Yes. Do I hold out much hope of any success with them? No.

But the day wasn't wasted - not at all. I finally met one of my all time favourite musicians. Busking! in Chester! The minute I turned the corner, and heard the haunting electric violin, I thought "That sounds like Ed Alleyne-Johnson" and sure enough, on closer inspection, it WAS him! WOWWWWWW! WOW! WOWWWW! We joined the crowd of interested onlookers, a silly grin on my face, to actually hear this violinist in real life. I've listened to his music often enough, infact one piece always raises the hairs on the back of my neck - its eerie, and haunting, soaring but with an underlying depth of beat to it - one of my favourite tunes. We stood, and listened and when there was a chance I went up to him and told him I'd been a fan of his for years, he shook my hand and smiled in acknowledgment but had other people clamouring for his attention, so I turned away with a rueful grin, and started back along the street........................until he started playing again.......................the piece that I love so much, the haunting melody of Oxford Suite 1. That stopped me dead in my tracks, and as a person pulled by the magic of his music, I returned to hear it in its entirety. Beautiful!!!!! I had a chance then, to go up to him, smile, and gave him my business card and say"Thankyou for that. I'm an Erotic Artist, and if you're in need of any art, let me know!". He took the card, and I left it at that. There wasn't much else to say, but I knew I wanted to make contact with him, I knew as a creative person how much I like it when someone makes the effort to speak to me and say they like my work. So I wanted to do it for someone I admired too.


And, on a final note for the day, here's the receipt for a meal we had in Chester. It makes me smile everytime I look at it............can you see why......................................:)

Why I'm not sunbathing

.......This is just me musing out loud.....

..... every so often I have time to sit back and have a think about what I want, and how I'm going to get it. And if its a small thing I usually know exactly how I'm going to get it, and I go out and do just that. But, if its a big thing, how do you get it? Especially when you're not exactly sure what "it" is! MMmmmm.....

As an artist you have to decide what sort of artist you are - whether you're the sort that sits at home and just paints pictures for yourself, copying them from photos in magazines and just putting them under the bed afterwards to collect dust. I'm way past being that sort of artist. Or whether you're the sort who goes out and learns more about art and painting and improves on your art, learns new techniques, finds local places to exhibit and sells small paintings very periodically for small amounts of money. I'm past being that sort of artist. Or whether you're the sort to decide you want to get out there (wherever that is!) and push your art more, and get more people interested in you, sell your work for higher prices and make a good living from it. And it's very difficult for any artist to do - all the artists I know have to subsidise selling their art by either teaching art to bring in a regular income, or having a "day job" that pays the bills and they do their art around it. So, if you're that sort of artist (and I know that I am) how do you do it? How do you achieve that goal? As far as I can see it's by promoting your art the best you can. And maybe its by going to an established gallery and getting them to hang your paintings. I've tried to a degree with little success. Galleries won't accept your work if you don't do the sort of work they're known for. If you're a figure painter there's no point in going to gallery known for landscapes. If you're a traditional watercolourist, there's no point in going to a modern art gallery. And also they won't accept you if you're not a "known" name. But how do you get to be "known" if they won't take your paintings? I've had problems in the past trying to get into a gallery, as my artwork doesn't "fit" what they do, as its neither traditional or contemporary. And also, there's the problem of the amount the galleries want for selling an artist's work. I've heard recently of an artist who isn't as good as me, selling his artwork in a London gallery and the paintings selling for £2,000 but the artist will only get £300 when the gallery have taken their cut of the sale. And I want a higher cut if I've done all the hard work, like painting it! So, galleries can be useful to sell and promote, and I can see the value of them, but if I can do it without them, I'd like to try, even if it is going to be a slower process to get my name known, doing it myself.

I suppose I could just drift along, waiting for things to happen, but that's not going to achieve much is it? Occasionally someone will contact me out of the blue wanting to buy a painting, and maybe that'll happen more and more as I get my name more well known. The more I paint, the more paintings will go out into the world, the more people will see them and contact me. So, do I spend my time promoting my work? Or painting? I want to paint. If I was to shut myself away for a year, I might just be able to do all the paintings that I've got in my mind, ready to paint. But I need to promote as well.

And maybe the answer is also to get prints made of my work, cos that is where the money is made for an artist, rather than the originals.

And all of this is why I'm not sunbathing. The sun is glorious at the moment, but I'm not in it. Because I have to paint. Or promote. Or look for a gallery. Or find out about prints of my artwork. Plus I've got a Christmas card to design. Not that I'm going to be paid for it, but because it'll be good promotion for me, and maybe, it'll bring some more work in for me. Maybe......

Humble in the shadow of Greatness

Just back from a wonderfully inspiring trip to see the famous art galleries of Florence. And I feel totally and utterly humbled by the experience. After standing just bare inches away from some of the worlds greatest masterpieces by Boticelli, Bellini, Leonardo da Vinci, Michaelangelo, Rubens, Raphael, Titan, (the list goes on....) I can see how I should be painting figures and where I fail dismally! And to see paintings by my all time favourite artist - Caravaggio, put me in seventh heaven; he who easily attains all the things I aspire to in a painting - dramatic poses, limited but bright lighting, and utter depth of darkness was bliss!!! And I fell in love, too, with the work of other lesser known artists such as Gherado Delle Notti, Filippino Lippi and Adriaen van der Werff - such detail, and utter brilliance! An awesome experience!

So, I've come back all fired up now after my arty trip and ready to start painting again. I've got loads to do and need to to some artwork done (else Lucy will fall out with me!).

And from the sublime to the ridiculous. The young lad on the checkout in the supermarket today suprised me somewhat by his rather personal and probing questions of whether I was happy, had had a good week and what I had been up to recently, so I started to answer him in slightly annoyed monosyllables until he laughed incrediously when I told him that I couldn't possibly tell him what I had been doing, as I'd be thrown out of the store! So, in an act of devilshness I leant forward, looked him in the eye, and whispered to him that I was an erotic artist and he could imagine the rest...... His jaw dropped in disbelief then a huge ecstatic grin spread across his face as he announced excitedly that I'd really made his day by that comment! And insisted I gave him a high five! I couldn't help but smile at his obvious delight, so that made my day too and I left the store with a big grin on my face!!