Finding love

Buying a new house means a lot of blank walls suddenly open themselves up to new possibilities.

But, that all has to wait until the fundamental stuff has been done. Things like putting saucepans and crockery in kitchen cupboards, toothpaste and soaps in the bathroom, hanging clothes in wardrobes, placing books on book shelves (particularly when my collection of books includes general non fiction, fiction, cookery books, gardening books, art books, travel books, and of course an extensive collection of erotic books!).

As well as filling cupboards and draws, I've had to go out and buy a lot of cupboards and draws!  So that in itself takes time. Infact Ikea rang me this week to see what the problem was, their shares had suddenly slumped because I hadn't paid them a visit (and when I say "pay them a visit", I don't think I've managed to made any of my visits last less then four hours!).

So, it all takes time.

And in the background are phone calls to the phone company (don't get me started on that one! Another soap opera in the making!), the service providers for electricity, gas, water, insurance, council tax, etc etc.

And of course, the walls in the rooms of the house remain blank whilst this is going on.

That's ok, I don't mind.

But, its odd for me too. Because I'm used to pictures being on walls. 

So, now that all the other stuff has been done, I can do the job that is so natural to me.
Placing pictures.

I'm fortuante, in that the new house doesn't need decorating. And I LIKE decorating. I know most people don't. But I do!

All the walls are a pretty, pale, welcoming cream. Innocuous pale cream. Pale, warm, invitingly open to being dressed in pictures.
My pictures.

I've looked at those walls for the last five weeks. Blank walls.

But last night, I put some pictures up.


And  I could see the whole importance of pictures. Because, when you look at blank walls, you see ....nothing. But, when you look at a picture hanging on the wall, you look INTO it - into the depths of it, and get lost within the image. And it doesn't matter if the image is of a still life, animals, of a landscape, of a person or people, whether it's erotic or not, you put yourself within that frame, and something within that frame should connect with you. You should feeeeel something of the image, and it should have an emotion within it that makes you feeeeeel good. It might be because it's of someone you love, an animal you love, or a place you love, or a view you love, or an erotic image that gives you fantasies you love, or a surreal selection of images that puts a lot of things together that you love, or camouflage art that hides something that you love, or something humourous that you love, or just the colours you love, but one way or another, it should make you very happy.

That's what art should do.
And that's what YOUR collection of art should do.

So this morning, when I awoke, and looked at the couple of pictures I had hung in the bedroom last night, I smiled. They are very suited to the bedroom. Well, certainly, my bedroom. They are subtle in their eroticness and they make me very happy.

Analysing me

I've been thinking about a conversation I've had with a good friend of mine this week (albeit by email, and albeit with many miles and the Atlantic ocean between us!). I've been thinking and analysing why I like painting erotic art and its interesting for me to look at it in depth, because a few people have asked me recently WHY I do erotic art. And there are quite a few reasons WHY. Some deep, some less so......

......its certainly an intellectual exercise for me, and I've always said that painting a picture is only one tenth of the thought process of producing it. But I also want my audience to think about the painting too, to react to it (hopefully in a positive way) so I try to involve subtle clues in various places, some intended, some created by serendipity and kept, and some are even found when I've not even known about them! So then the viewer will get whichever messages they've picked up and if its erotic, their mind will start to think erotic thoughts... I understand the thoughts I've INTENDED to put in the painting, but sometimes I find thoughts I hadn't considered are there. Wow! I love it when that happens! Because as my friend so eloquently says there is no more mystery or intrigue for me when I create a painting than there is for the author of a detective novel who knows which character committed the murder long before the last chapter...... and that is indeed true for the intended reactions. BUT this is one of the reasons why I like erotic art - that people will have different reactions to it than they would JUST looking at a pretty landscape or vase of flowers - then the reaction is just "that's nice!"- BUT for me to depict erotic art, I have to have a good understanding of what people like in a picture, and as an erotic image, what happens within their brain, and then I have to get in there and try to capture all of what they like, and put it down on paper to make them like it even more through shapes, line and colour! Its a sort of psychological visual conversation and communication. I want my images to be more spiritual and intuitive and emotional than "just a vase of flowers" - which I am very capable of painting, but am not inspired by it as a subject matter - there is no emotional commitment or exchange between the viewer and the artist.

So that's one of the reasons I like painting erotic art - the communication between me and the viewer.

And which is probably why I write a blog about being an erotic artist too!!! :)

What a reaction

I met a young woman last night through an acquaintance. It was the first time we'd met, and neither of us knew the other existed before we laid eyes on each other. We were introduced, and the conversation turned to generalities, as it does. I said a jokey throw away comment about male models, and then the conversation turned to art, and I explained that I was an erotic artist. The young woman thought that was wonderful, her fella was totally taken aback (since he knows me for another reason and has no idea I'm an artist of any kind, let alone erotic art!!!!). I chatted then with the woman, who was fascinated in the subject, and I went on to tell her about my latest project with the "Fantasy fannies" which delighted her on all levels! I then went to get the paintings to show them to her properly, and she loved them. Really really loved them! Her fella wasn't so sure, and before I showed them to him he said "You're scaring me now!" - I know he has a dry sense of humour, that greatly amuses me, but I wasn't sure whether he was serious or not..... Maybe he was......

Is it scary for men?

Is it only women who "get" this idea?

He said after he's seen the paintings, that he liked them - he'd seen a landscape painting whilst on holiday that had appealed greatly to him, and it was painted in the same bright vibrant way. I said I could do him a landscape in that way if he wanted one, of the place of his choice. He was interested in my proposition.... but equally I think his woman was interested in the Fantasy fanny idea too......... and she says she has other girl friends who would be very interested in them too.

I have the idea they went home, with him saying "Bloody hell, I never knew Jackie did paintings like that!" and she saying "Mmmmm..... yes and I can just picture mine hanging above the fire in the living room" !!!!

..........

And another thing I've been considering this week - is this.... I know I've had a wonderfully positive response from everyone who's seen the Fantasy fannies - but would any one buy one that is not theirs? Would a woman want another womans fanny hanging on her wall (if she was heterosexual, I mean, if she was bi or lesbian, I know I'd get a different answer to that question!). I think men might give me a different answer - but would they only want their girlfriends or wifes fanny hanging on the wall ? Or would they buy any of the ones they fancy? I'm wondering if only the owners of the "queyntes" would want to buy them? Have a created a total "niche" market? .....................And I know there's a pun in there, if you look closely enough.........

What do you think? Can you see any of the fannies hanging on your wall? Or only your own?

Garden party

I went to a garden party over the weekend. Well, two, technically. It was a garden in Yorkshire, and I knew very few people there, except the people holding the party. It was a beautiful setting and quite a lot of people attended. You nod and say hello and smile at people, and conversation starts, and flows (hopefully) and moves from subject to subject. And the one thing that is guaranteed a reaction is the "I'm an erotic artist" one. Guaranteed everytime...... or so I thought!

The first party in the garden was during the day, lots of nice friendly folk there, keen gardeners and creative types. I had a couple of lovely chats about erotic art with two very nice older women and their general interest in the subject delighted me.

Later on that evening, the second party, still in the same garden, was for a slightly younger set of people, but during my many conversations it was mostly the older ones in their fifties and sixties who were interested in my art. Even if they didn't know much about art, they were happy to listen to me talk about it and exchange views on the subject. And there was one chap in particular who showed a lot of interest and asked very pertinent questions. I was more than happy to explain about erotic art to him. And he asked a good question "What's the purpose of erotic art?" And I hesitated before I replied - for me, art should be appealing, it should be pleasing to the eye, and erotic art should have an air of mystery about it. It shouldn't be too explicit, and it should be sensual. So then that made me think about how men and women view erotic art - if its a picture of a woman, does the man viewing it think that he'd like to see his lover do that, and if its a woman, does she imagine herself doing what the woman in the picture is doing? And then, the chap I was talking to, said something really profound about my art and its purpose, but it was just as something else was happening, so I didn't take it in fully, and afterwards when I prompted him to repeat it, he couldn't remember what he'd said, and neither could I! Bugger! And I know it was really important, and now its lost for ever. I'll never know it. Unless he's reading this, and remembers! In which case can you email me please!! (and yes, it'll teach me to listen properly in future!).

And later on that night, very late on, in the early hours, there was a younger set of people standing around chatting, we talked of visits to Amsterdam, and Bangkok, of sex shops and sex shows, and then I thought it might be pertinent to mention that I was an erotic artist, there was complete.......................silence. And no response whatsobloomingever. What was that all about then?????!

Unexpected responses

I attended a workshop at the weekend, one of many that I go to throughout the year. This time we were painting a Cornish harbour scene in watercolours by one of those step by step demonstrations that I dislike so much as they leave no room for your own artistic input. Not that they're made for anything but learning the technique of the artist who's teaching, so they don't expect you to use your own creativity much! This particular artist knew that the group was of a high standard so he'd brought a challenging painting for us to do. Which was fine by me. We had to draw the boats, sea, harbour wall, cottages on the hillside in the middle distance and sky above. Then he showed us how to paint the sky and hillside, followed by the middle distance, the sea and reflections and boats (boats are always a difficult subject, not that water and reflections are much easier either!!!). The tutor walked around the room, scanning everyones work and adding bits of advice as he went. Of course he didn't know any of us so he didn't know the standard of artists he was dealing with. Any one of us could have been the sort who ask "How do you make purple?". So he flitted around the room, looking at our work and adding his tutorly advice. And the bit I liked was when I could see in his eyes that he knew that I knew how to paint, even when my painting was only a quarter into the painting process, he could tell. And I liked that. Very much. I liked the respect I could see. As the day progressed, my painting progressed, and he could see I was enjoying doing it (and I was, even though it was a step-by-step painting, because it was such a challenging subject). And he brightly said "I can see you'll be doing this sort of painting again, won't you?" And I smiled. He must have been aware at that point by the muffled sniggers in the background, that he'd said something amusing. But he wasn't quite sure what. And I said, grinning, that I didn't normally paint this subject matter. And because he was a polite and interested guy he enquired "So, what do you usually paint?" and I smiled in a friendly and outgoing way and loftily said "I'll tell you at the end of the session!". He was intrigued. And five minutes later he was back again and said authoritatively "Tell me what you paint" and I replied, firmly, but again with a smile, that I would tell him at the end......

We carried on painting trying to finish the paintings in the alloted time, and at the end of the session, we all sat around in a group and each painting was put up infront of everyone else and comments were made on it, each person said what they had got out of the session and the tutor added any comments he felt were necessary. When he got to me he asked me my first name "Jackie" I said, and he took my painting off me to put it up for the others to see. He asked me what I had got out of the day, and I said how much I had enjoyed it even though I don't like step-by-step workshops and it had been a challenging subject which had suited me admirably and I was very pleased with the end result of my painting. He added a few comments about my painting, then, infront of everyone, said again, very authortively "Now, tell me what you do!" So I smiled and said "I'm an erotic artist, and if I was painting this picture myself I would incorporate a pair of lovers in one of the boats in the harbour, or hide them within the painting, perhaps making the distant hills the silhouette of a naked woman". And smiled as one of the women who knows me reasonably well quipped, "The couple are in the upstairs bedroom of the cottage second from the left!" His response was "Do you have a website?" and I smiled and said yes I had and would give him the details of it. And then a couple more people there asked me for my website address too - including the elderly woman sitting next to me, who I don't know particularly other than a smiling and pleasant woman who looks like she might bake cakes for the local WI or be a keen gardener. She was certainly the last person in that room who I expected to ask me for my erotic website address!!

And people do still surprise me by their response to my artwork. I was in the pub over the weekend and saw someone I've not seen for very many years. She's in her late twenties now and I've known her very well since she was eight. I know her family very well too and it was a delight to bump into her as I've not seen her for probably ten years or so. We hugged in delighted greeting, and she asked me what I was doing now and I said "Well, I still paint but I've changed what I do now" and she asked me what I do and I said "I'm an erotic artist" and her eyes widened in that way it does with people when they're not expecting the answer they've got and she said "Oh yes, tell me more!" and we had a really interesting conversation for the rest of the night about erotic art, art in general and erotic things, and I loved every minute of it! We also talked about our mutual travel experiences and the sex hotspots of the world we'd both visited and compared notes, but that's another story!!!!

Unfinished business

How do you rate a success? How do you decide whether something has gone right? Mmm... not always by the end result, but sometimes by the journey itself, I think. And that is how I view the most recent painting I've done of Hornymaleuk and my female model. The event was a success, the creative process was a success, but at the moment the finished product isn't wholly a success. It certainly needs more work doing on it, and I can possibly do it without the pair of them posing together for me (because due to logistics it may take a while to organise it). So, I may be able to do it by my imagination alone, but I certainly need to think about how to do that as well.............



So, on to the occasion......... it was good to see Hornymaleuk again, since I've not seen him for a few months, and as he and the model have met before there was no need for breaking the ice between them, they know each others personalities and characters well enough. We had a drink to start, which gave us all time to relax, the mutual telling of dirty jokes also helping somewhat!!


Then, the decision regarding the pose. I had come up with a few ideas before seeing them both so we all discussed the possibilities of using them, the pros and cons, the likelihood of aches, pains, muscle cramps and pins and needles ensuing. Then, since my poses were deemed unworkable in the long term, we worked around finding different poses for them to work with. All this was done with their clothes on, with me walking around them looking for the best angles, composition, lighting and "eroticness" of the poses. There's a very fine line between pornographic and erotic. And in turn, erotic and lifedrawing. For instance, if the man in the composition hasn't got an erection, then it can't be erotic, but if he has then it can sometimes be deemed to be pornographic! And since Hornymaleuk and the female model weren't actually going to HAVE sex, I had to give the impression that they WERE whilst they actually WEREN'T. MMMmm....... so, more thoughts regarding the poses working properly as an erotic image.....

FINALLY, we found a pose we were all happy with. Eureka! But even though it takes time, and I know that it usually does, I have to persevere with it because there is absolutely NO point in going for the first pose I think of, if the models are going to be in untold agonies within three minutes of starting it. It's ok for a photographic pose, because the model only needs to hold the pose for a few seconds, but not for an artists model (and I'm a quick painter!).


So, the pose worked fine, mostly, except the female model had to break quite a bit as there was too much pressure on her hands, but on the whole she did really well, and certainly the pose was easier for Hornymaleuk since he most mostly just lying on his back with a luscious woman sitting on top of him. Sigh. And we call this work!


So, do I like the finished picture? Mmmm..... yeeeessssssss, BUT, (and its a big but), the picture isn't finished. So don't view it like it is. Just count this as a work in progress picture, half done, with the gist of the emotions and eroticness of the image, but it is the under painting, leading on to the finished image. It's *part* of the creative process, and I have hesitated and wondered about showing it to you at this stage, because you're BOUND to look at it and think "that's crap". So, don't look at it as DONE, look at it as part of the journey of getting *there*....... where-ever "there" is! And I don't know where it is, until I get there! So, if you're gonna be critical, I'll listen, but with only half an ear................ cos it's only half done.


There's some aspects of it I really love, and some I really hate, some parts need a lot more work doing on them, on some of the lines, and shapes, on the negative shapes, the divisions of colours, the blending of colours, the lighting, the shadows, well, everything, really!!! I love the use of red, cream, black and gold, so I'm happy with the choice of colours at least! and I think it's a powerful pose, and I think it is erotic as a pose!!


And, as a further comment, it was nice after I'd finished painting, to finally relax (because painting is hard work, and I need to fully concentrate when I'm painting) and sit down and share a bottle of wine with Hornymaleuk and discuss our various worlds and the people who inhabit them. And it was really good to chat with a fellow blogger, in real life.

A gathering of eroticness

Since I joined the Guild of Erotic Artists in October last year I've not had chance to go to any of their "Event" days but yesterday I was able to change that state of affairs! I've only met a very few of the members briefly at the Erotica show at Olympia in London last November so it was good to go to the Beaumont Hall Studios in Hertfordshire and meet some more of them and compare notes on erotic art and life in general! I know it can be daunting walking through the door of somewhere when you don't know anyone, and have never been there before, but everyone I spoke to had a ready smile, made good eye-contact and made me very welcome. I felt quite at home, helped of course by the fact that there were tasty sausage sandwiches and endless hot cups of tea! I was able to spend time chatting and getting to know people and put faces and names together. I know when I've joined art organisations before, part of the "getting to know you" aspect is also learning who does what sort of art and learning their particular styles and techniques. In some cases I can instantly recognise a painting I've never seen before, just because I recognise the style of the artwork of the artist, as individual as someones handwriting!

Everyone I spoke to was down to earth, helpful and full of good advice on selling, promotion, producing art and techniques for creating art. There were models there as well as artists and photographers and sculptors. A couple of the guys there had some of their artwork in portfolios and I must admit I had a smile to myself when one of them asked me "Would you like to see my etchings?" - normally that's a euphemism for a man trying to seduce a woman, but in this case, he just wanted to show me his erotic etchings and talk about the art! How refreshing!

Most of the time I was there I spent the time chatting to a photographer and found him delightful company! He's been in the guild for a bit longer than me and was more than happy to discuss his photographic art and there were some interesting comparisons to my work, even though he's a photographer and I'm an artist. We had a similar outlook on catching the light in our art and determining what we considered to be "erotic" within art. I know there is no definitive definition of what makes "erotic" but he and I seemed to be in agreement of what we basically agreed it to be...... that frisson of subtle interest that makes you wonder what's going to happen next....MMMmmmmm!! And we also compared notes on who had the easier technique for capturing the "moment" - as far as I'm concerned I think that photographers have a more difficult time as they only have a split second to capture the "instant" of the erotic image, whereas an artist can change whatever they want to make the image more "interesting" by changing the composition, the lighting, the colours, and the focal point. But, interestingly he thought artists had the worse time of it, because then they had to spend hours creating that one image that he could capture in as many "split seconds" as he wanted. Mmm.... an interesting and thought provoking comparison! We also discussed which sex had the easier time of it as a producer of erotic art. I think it must be easier for men than women to work in the business, because as a woman I think it's more difficult and you might be opening yourself up to undesirable attentions from men who might perhaps think that you're offering more than just art. Whereas my photographer friend thought it was a lot easier for women painting erotic art as they wouldn't be viewed as "perverts" whereas maybe an older man photographing younger women would be! Ok, that's got me thinking too! Maybe he's got a point!

Later on I had the opportunity to talk to one of the models there. She's more mature than some of the other models, and it was refreshing to hear her down to earth views on body shape and being comfortable within your own skin rather than worrying over your body shape because it's less than perfect (than the photos that appear in glossy magazines when all the blemishes have been airbrushed out if it anyway!). I think a lot of men prefer women who are comfortable with their bodies and happy within themselves. Although I equally know that doesn't stop women searching for the perfect shape and wanting to improve on what nature has given them!

So, all in all a good, positive and productive day. I'm looking forward to my next visit!

Setting off a chain of events

Last night I spent a very enjoyable time with a diverse gathering of people from different nations. Seated at dinner, my companions were, amongst others, English, Polish, American, Scottish, Danish and Turkish. An eclectic mix, and possibly more enjoyable because of it. And most I had not met before. So, when polite discourse starts over the meal-table people ask the normal questions of well-being, vocations and inter-relationships with others around the table. And you spend time surreptitiously viewing the new acquaintances, taking in physical form, facial expressions, choice of clothing and deciding how appealing their personality is to your own. As they do with you. Its part of the game of getting to know someone. Polite talk ensues whilst you assimilate all these factors. And then they get around to the question..... "And what do you do, Jackie?" and I smile pleasantly and say "I'm an artist". "Oh" they say "Do you paint landscapes?" "No" I smile "Although I can do, I'm an erotic artist" and then I wait for the response. And when its a different ethnic background to your own, you're even more intrigued of the reaction you'll get. And when a woman asks the question and I give my reply, I'm never quite sure what sort of response I'm going to get either, and it will be even more so when its a woman from a different country. The Danish woman who asked it, last night, was very elegant, both in her looks and clothing. Her Turkish male companion, was very quiet, but intently listening to everything said around him. I waited for the response. And it was instantly very favourable, positive and interested to know more! So I talked, and expounded on my subject, passed over a business card which was inspected by them both. I carried on talking and noticed the guy busy doing something in his lap under the damask table cloth. My interest was piqued.... until I was shown that he was looking at my website on his mobile phone. Ah!!! The wonders of technology, over the soup! But at least they could view what I was talking about, and could see what artwork I produce, what subject matter and images are mine. And then, the previously quiet man started talking..... and it turned out we're in the same line of business! He creates erotic images too, albeit moving ones! So we have a lot in common, and the whole experience was quite normal for the pair of us. It just goes to show, more people than you first realise are working with erotica! And what I like about it is that its all quite normal, healthy and accepted amongst like-minded people.


Also at the dinner was a catalyst. It was in human form. And one I've not seen for a year or so. The first time I met him I found him dynamic and one of the most inspiring, funny, delightful and witty men I know. He's also disabled physically and struggles with getting around, but manages to make light-hearted jokes about his problems and always radiates good energies and positive up-beat vibes. I love his openness and being in his company as we talk about so many varied subjects. And the reason I know he's a catalyst? Because it was during a conversation with him over a year ago that started an interesting chain of events for me. Because he put me in touch with Lucy, and through Lucy I updated my website to more erotic art, which led on to me promoting myself more, and I started my blog, which led on to my selling more erotic artwork, and becoming an international artist, which led on to some delightful Americans coming to visit me to see my art, and me talking to the WI about being an erotic artist and being accepted in the Guild of Erotic Artists. All of this happened last year because of one conversation. I know my life would be different now if I had not had that initial conversation. He didn't do anything other than mention the name of someone else who also worked in erotica. I did the rest myself. And worked hard at it. But often its the people we meet in life who change the direction we're going in.

And to finish with another conversation I had over the course of the evening, with no preamble whatsoever a male acquaintance who I've not seen for some months said he thought my painting "Getting acquainted" was quite provocative! I laughed and asked how, when all that was happening was in his head! The image isn't showing anything other than a seated man and a woman kneeling infront of him. The title and your imagination is creating the rest of the image! But the guy I was talking to obviously found it a powerful one! Good. That's what images should be. Powerful enough for him to mention it to the artist who created it. But I possibly might not have painted it if I had not had that initial conversation with the catalyst..........

Jam and naked women

Why is it that I've been painting for years, have had a website for over five years but its only since I've told people I'm an erotic artist that their interest in me has manifested itself? Mmmm.... I wonder why! So last Saturday night whilst I'm standing chatting to friends in the pub, someone introduced me to a new face and was told that I'm an erotic artist. "Really?" she said, here we go, I thought, what's coming next and was totally unprepared for the question "Will you come and talk to the W.I?" - "What? Are you serious?" I asked and she agreed she was indeed!! "But I thought the W.I were all jam and Jerusalem, knitting and pretty flower arrangements, won't my subject matter curl the hair of the blue rinse brigade?" Apparently not! This particular group are easy going, very broad-minded and good fun and I've been booked to appear, to chat and tell them what I get up to.............. I can't wait!!!!!